All posts by Jocelyn the Plaid

In the movie Robocop, Murphy and Lewis lay mired in a muddy pit at the end, both wounded. Murphy is lying on his back, trapped under fallen steel girders. As Clarence Boddicker goes in for the kill, Murphy extrudes a secret pointy spear and slices the evil Clarence’s carotid artery. Spurt, spurt. Evil is vanquished,… Read More

Turnerdom began a quest awhile back. Sunset Grocery had put a premium honey brand on sale right after the clover honey spluttered its last farewell into a teacup. So buckwheat honey gained entrance to the tea cabinet. This led to the startling discovery that some honeys don’t taste remotely like the clover honey of my… Read More

“I am not nuts. … I was right except for the mandroid thing, thank you.”  ~ Ron in Supernatural, upon learning he was right about the secret evil lurking around him. Ron was right, but Ron got shot dead by a well-meaning, human security guard. It doesn’t matter how well you can detect demons if you let… Read More

I think this might be the top of my head. I’m not quite sure. I have taken many fun photos lately. What does this picture tell us? “She obviously has way too much time on her hands!”  is not the answer. “She could use a bit more hair” is not the answer, either. “Could be… Read More

Wham! Wham! The candies and minutes disappear. The app can be our friend. I love having the weather at my fingertips, for example. If not for a tap on my phone, I might’ve walked out into this 54° morning in a short, burgundy, white-striped dress with white sandals.  I looked at my phone and quickly… Read More

Again, if you are singing your way through life, you can skip this post. Today’s advice for singers and others: Try Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Covered Ginger. You might melt a small handful of these tasty pellets in your microwave, using this as a base for today’s hot chocolate. There’s probably some foodie way you… Read More

Some of us are lucky. We get the mom and/or dad we need. Maybe grandpa fills the gap when mom gets too busy with the new boyfriend, survivalist buddies, or ancestry.com. But the universe is busy dealing cards furiously and haphazardly. Maybe we get the dad who means well, rather than the dad who understands… Read More

Or better yet, be yourself with a spiffy new superhero name. BatJocelyn? Maybe not. I think WompRat Jocelyn is out, too, as Wombat Woman tumbles into the total reject pile. The Kumquat Whisperer? That name has advantages. No league of superheroes is likely to try to draft me with a name like that. Still, what will… Read More

Are you too busy? Are you working too hard? Or are you simply overextended and overcommitted? Only you can define too busy. Some humans never see themselves as overcommitted.  They take over the publicity for the Kitty Cat Foster Care event at the mall without a moment’s thought.  Kudos to all the people holding up our charities… Read More

(This device enables you to be hands-free while eating your burger. You put it over your neck somehow.) Yesterday morning, trending on Yahoo was especially entertaining. 1.       Megan Rapinoe 2.       Charlie Sheen 3.       Jessica Alba 4.       Dalia Dippolito 5.       Home Alarm Systems 6.       Background Check 7.       Taylor Swift 8.       Tupac Shakur 9.       SUV Lincoln Navigator… Read More