“$350 jeans are dead. $100 leggings killed them”!!

That’s what the Washington Post says anyway. I can still find those holey jeans out there, so rumors of their demise may be premature. But the fact that Walmart sells holey jeans cannot be good for those who are ripping denim at the most exalted levels. True Religion will be closing 27 stores soon, for example.

But $100 yoga pants? Are we mental? Ron Weasley might wonder, and with reason. They are yoga pants, not silver earrings. Yoga pants are only one step removed from yesterday’s bygone tights.

What, so we slap a waistband on stretchy pants and call them art?  I do like how Lululemon calls its pants, “the Holy Grail of Yoga Pants.” The Wunder Under Hi-Rise Tight Nulux 28″ runs $128 on Lululemon’s website.  That’s cheap for a Holy Grail, but pretty damn pricey for an item of clothing that clings much too tightly to the average female butt.  I’d try to sell those Nuluxes by calling them Grails, too.

For those who have all those extra hundreds laying around the house, I say wear whatever you like. It’s your money. I never had any fashion sense anyway. According to the Washington Post, all the fashionable women are wearing yoga pants.

But before you hand over your Benjamin Franklins, it might be worth asking how much we should value the Washington Post’s opinion. At the end of the yoga pants article, the Post posed a fascinating question, one which I never, ever would have thought to ask:

“You can now snort chocolate — but should you?”

No, you shouldn’t. It’s that simple. And you should not spend $128 for yoga pants unless your discretionary income is … considerable, at the very least.

Zombie phrase for the day: Yoga pants are very comfortable when you are dead.

Ooohgahhh ahnnndnzz ahhh ehhhwee guhmmmmdabuhhh ehhn ooh ahhh eehhhdd.