“My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.” Mitch Hedberg
Mitch obviously bought the wrong fake plants. The ones in my house keep thriving, year after year. Sometimes they need dusting, but they wait patiently for me. While my plants add no oxygen to the atmosphere, they don’t do that sudden, inexplicable dive into death either.
Today’s advice: Are you a horticultural failure? Give up! Purchase a new plastic or silk centerpiece from the local florist or even make one of your own. A quick trip to Michael’s for flowers can set you up for years. Why not make life easy?
On a Metalevel: Pretending is essential to the maintenance of fakery. If your pretending/fakery ratio has gotten out of balance somehow, I recommend visiting art shows, and watching science fiction and fantasy movies. Reading may work even better, as your mind conjures up its personal versions of authors’ creations.
