Oh so tired. Can’t think of anything to do but write a little. Halloween, I guess.

More zombie-free reminiscences:

The slip of paper from the jar says to tell about holiday traditions. I’ll start with Halloween, a holiday that has mostly faded from view since the children grew up. We used to costume shop, shop for candy and buy decorations for the house which we sometimes managed to get up, a lame display of spider web on bushes, a few carved pumpkins on the porch and maybe some plastic spiders thrown in to add to the less than scary effect. For a few years, until the cardboard disintegrated, we had a few plastic-covered, cardboard gravestones that said stuff like “RIP” and “Izzy Dead.” Once or twice, I hung cute Halloween lights in the windows. We paid lip service to the Gods of Holiday Decoration, for my part in order to make the kids happy.

I’ll admit I always enjoyed throwing on a cloak and witches hat. We need more dress-up days generally. My hats and cloaks are bored in my closet. Come May of this school year, I may see if I can create a few unholiday nontraditions as I free the denizens of my closet.

One regular ritual came after the holiday. Albert wanted to throw the “extra” candy away because he thought there was too much. I objected. Throw away perfectly good candy? He wanted the children to eat more healthfully. I figured they had gone out to stalk the wild chocolate beast and they should be allowed to eat their kill. I’m pretty sure he tossed some candy, but I defended the bags as best I could. I always enjoyed the careful emptying and sorting of the bags, the thought that went into creating various piles for future consumption. I also knew, even if Albert didn’t believe it, that the girls had a pretty good idea of exactly what their haul had been.

The truth is, we have always been the poor relations of decorations in our neighborhood, a burb filled with elaborate displays of scarecrows in chairs and bodies hanging out windows onto roofs. I take after my mom who took the minimalist approach to holidays. She sat and read while the world swirled on around her, making sure her children had costumes and she had candy for kids at the door. If I had not lived in the land of motion-activated haunting machines, I’m not sure I’d have even bought the cobwebs, except for the kids.

When the children could be trusted to go alone, for a few years, I did join a friend who would sit outside by an outdoor heater, drinking wine and watching children pass by.  As traditions go, I’ll recommend drinking wine with friends as the sun goes down on Halloween night. I had to stick Albert with candy duty for that one, though.

Currently, I hand out sugar while trying to calm down the dog, who goes nuts from the repeated doorbells. Oct 31st has become Dog Whisperer day. “It’s OK, sweetheart. Stop barking. Stop barking. That’s enough. Stop barking. Will you please stop barking?” She stops.

And then the doorbell rings again.

P.S.  I reread this and think maybe I lost a bit of flavor in my fatigue. Halloween carries memories of tiny vampires, Pink Power Rangers and girls in silver space helmets. Proud children marched around Grove Elementary School while parents followed them, taking pictures. I marched in the evening, following children through neighborhoods on lengthy journeys.  They were dauntless, my children. I had a great time and, in the end, managed to lay claim to many small packets of Whoppers.

Data eats me alive

(Suspicious moans have been heard from the district board office, but no one has gone to explore the little brick building across the street. Frankly, Jocelyn is pretty sure she will be better off if that office is now filled with zombies. Nobody inside has appeared to be using their brains for quite some time now, but they keep issuing directives anyway. With luck, her administrators will be unable to figure out how to open the office doors and will remain trapped inside, unable to figure out how to work their phones and computers. If so, we will all be better off.)

Where are the posts, you say? Where has she gone? She is busy building spreadsheets, trying to find spreadsheets, and trying to tease useful data out of spreadsheets. She does not intend to bitch about her job in this blog, so that’s enough said about spreadsheets. This year’s crop of students have been hit up the side of the head by increasingly rigorous academic requirements. Scores have been so low for so long that she is willing to try to teach the new requirements, whether students are willing to board this train or not. They’ll get on the train eventually.

She plans to drive to North Chicago this Saturday morning to tutor a group of boys at McDonalds. She even intends to feed them. A few years ago, a guy named Francisco Rodriguez took a group of similar kids and managed to get a few of them into high school honors math classes. Right now, her group consists mostly of the hopelessly lost who keep trying anyway. Soon she’ll add the ‘somewhat less lost than most of them’ and see what she can do.

So that’s Jocelyn’s latest.

As to the moans across the street and the probable zombification of all her district administrators, Jocelyn wishes to quote Stephen King in “The Stand.”

“No great loss.”

She does not understand how  inability to read one’s tests does not at least merit a discussion on possibly,  just possibly, adapting tests and materials to meet student needs.

Not much for alternative medicine here

 

BloodViscosity

The biography jar offered up the following topic: Tell about home cures or old wives’ tales for curing hiccups, warts, toothaches, colds, earaches, birth control, arthritis, etc.

Ummm… The jar strikes again. What kind of a silly topic is this? We don’t have many such cures here. I suppose I could record a few:

Professional development meetings can be cured by massages that last at least one hour.

There are no cures for colds. Drambuie may nevertheless seem medicinal. Saline nose spray never hurts.

No one should ever try any old wive’s tale for birth control. The best cure for curing birth control — if you want to read the sentence above literally — will be pregnancy although menopause serves equally well.

Directly applying Selsun Blue to a fungal infection caught from a cat will cure the infection after doctors have failed you. I remember this one from my twenties. I did not want to pay for a culture so my mom suggested the Selsun Blue plan first. I will recommend this unusual home cure. It saved me a lot of money. You end up with red, irritated skin for about a week but eventually that passes and you are cured.

Need a home cure for anxiety? Meditation alleviates anxiety. So does hypnosis. Spirit animals and animal manifestions of your inner child can also prove useful.

Readers: What does your inner child look like? The toddler-you has a great deal of wisdom. She/he knows when you are doing things that are not fun, for example. The toddler-you will naturally steer you away from tedious obligations and toward hot fudge sundaes. If you think life is not enough fun lately, you might try visualizing the toddler-you. Find yourself and have a conversation.

You don’t need to listen. If she says, “Quit that job now!” you might want to reason with her.  But older is not necessarily smarter. Wisdom can be learned. Wisdom can also be forgotten.

Readers: Do you have home cures? What are they? Feel free to journal on this topic.

Having merged the blogs, I will make one zombie observation: That idea where you cover yourself in zombie blood to avoid attracting the zombies? Ummmm, do the words “blood-borne virus” sound any of the cymbals in your cortex?

For zombie fluids management, I offer one word: Bleach.

Or even better, as mommy used to say, “Don’t touch!”

What is your favorite soup?

 

clam

My soup favorites change with time. Clam Chowder has always been a contender. Various squash soups run high on the list. My current favorite is pozole. I liked the Panera Bread version so much that I bought a couple of cups to go and told Albert to reproduce the contents of those paper cups. He has become much better at pozole than Panera ever was. He still can’t reproduce Popeye’s Red Beans and Rice, but I’ve enjoyed eating his progress. It’s fun to hand Albert a challenge.

We have this perfect system here. He cooks. I eat. He never complains either. He’s watched me destroy eggs and other simple ingredients often enough to know that he should man the frying pan. Years ago I cooked an over-easy egg that I photographed because of its uncanny resemblance to a razor clam. The pic above is a real clam since the other clam rests in a box somewhere but, except for the fact that one clam sits in a frying pan, the two look pretty much the same.

 

 

Favorite family places

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The slip from the jar asks a disquieting question: What is a favorite family place to go with your spouse and kids? This question ought to be a no-brainer. When I was a kid, the answer for my parents would have been camping at the Pacific Ocean.  We pitched our tent regularly and those cold ocean beaches remain my favorite places on the planet.

My family cannot provide a clean answer. Albert seldom ventures out of his man cave and favors museums. Albert, Sam and I have enjoyed multiple trips to the Art Institute of Chicago, for example, dragging poor Abby along most of the time. Abby does not like museums much, especially those filled with two-dimensional art. She has more tolerance for science and industry, natural science and modern art/sculpture, but if we gave up museums altogether, I doubt she’d mourn their passing.  Sam and I enjoy European churches. Abby likes them about as much as she likes museums, maybe less.

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When the children were young, they attended many science fiction conventions with me. Sam went to Windycon because it was across from Woodfield mall, I think. Abby got dragged along. She sometimes seemed to be enjoying herself, but a desire to learn Klingon has never manifested itself.

archons4_

The girls and I like festivals. We have seen numerous strawberry, chocolate and apple festivals in Long Grove. We eat, shop and wander. They used to ride the ponies. We have been to the Renaissance Faire annually for many of our years.  Will we make it this year? Maybe not. Abby has begun putting her foot down. She will not go if the temperature runs much above the low seventies. Outdoor heat wipes her out.

The girls and I love visiting grandparents and many, many miles have been logged between O’Hare and SeaTac airports. Albert has not gone for years, though. The clutter upsets his OCD nature and parent houses are about 2 for 10 on the accessibility scale. Still, for the three girls in the family, trips to the Tacoma waterfront, to Mineral Lake, to Mount Rainier and Seattle probably rank as the family favorites.IMG_0535

So we’re a bit dysfunctional here. Sam and I enjoy travel to far places. The train shot at the top of this  post shows a German countryside out the window. Abby does not share our enthusiasm, but has seen Korea and some parts of Europe in spite of herself. We fragment our activities into threesomes, twosomes and an occasional foursome for dinner. Everybody loves food. We all like to go to Kiki’s Bistro or Miller’s Pub in Chicago. The other semi-regular, foursome activities are family dinner and watching British mysteries in the front room after dinner.

Readers: Are you writing your journal yet? This topic might be a great place to start.

 

 

What political party comes closest to expressing your own point of view?

political parties

The biography jar threw out a tricky topic, one I tend to stay away from in posts and daily life.  Among other considerations, I believe that political oratory becomes largely wasted by the late twenties. By middle-age, nobody changes nobodies mind no how. I can put all the cogent arguments in favor of the Green Party or the Libertarian Party together, express them perfectly and I will still get exactly nowhere if my goal is to change someone else’s mind. I may clarify my own thinking, but that’s another issue.

Our minds are made up. That’s part of the problem today. We reject the facts that don’t support our views as mistaken and may even classify these views as malicious propaganda. We latch on to facts that support our views, often without reviewing sources and agendas.  Americans have become polarized and, unfortunately, the best strategy I know for dealing with this clustering at the poles seems to be avoidance. You go your way, I’ll go mine.

That said, perhaps it’s time for America to reject the “wasted vote” argument. The idea that we have to vote for a democrat or republican because any other vote is useless has led many people to implicitly support a system that may not deserve our support. If we all vote repuplican or demoprat, how will we ever truly protest our leaders’ failures? These last few years have shown an appalling inability to compromise on both sides.

Next time, I think I will vote for Gary Johnson or his successor. I am more Libertarian than anything else. I want to suck a lot of government out of education and business for the sake of students and small business owners everywhere. I want my doctor friends to be able to practice medicine without losing hours and hours to paperwork each week. I want less government intervention and more personal freedom. I encourage others to vote for the Green Party, the Justice Party or whatever party most meshes with their personal views.

We are overdue for a protest vote. The problem with picking the lesser of two evils is that the lesser-evil may view their “win” as a mandate, and that mandate as an excuse not to work with the other party.  I’d like to send both parties a message:  We don’t want these extremes. We want our parties to communicate and work together.

(Actually, I’d like a Libertarian government. But I’d settle for a more functional one that listened to what the electorate wanted — all of the electorate — and acted accordingly.)

 

Do/did you have a favorite magazine? Describe what you enjoy about this magazine.

IMG_0064 Artist unknown.

Another slip has been drawn from the biography jar. Favorite magazine? I’ve subscribed to a few, neglected many. My magazines mostly become end table décor. I appreciate “The Economist” because of its global perspective and regular attempts at objectivity. Bias in the news has reached levels that mostly keep me away from domestic news sources. Liberal or conservative, local pundits bring too many axes to bear as they hatchet away at their subjects. For example, I love Charles Krauthammer, but let’s be real: Is it really possible that Obama has never done anything right during his entire term? I did read Entertainment for awhile. I like to keep up on my Who Doctors and other favorite TV characters. I did read Analog. Science fiction short stories delivered to the house are always a win.

All told, I prefer comic books to news magazines. I avoid entertainment magazines because I never have enough time for my to-do list as it is. When I read, I read books. I also surf the net, link by link tracing Ebola’s progress. The net has subsumed my magazines, I suspect. Readers: Are you reading magazines? Are you reading more or fewer magazines? If you are not reading magazines, why not? This could be your journal topic for the day.  Or not.

Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer and chocolate cheerios

I look to my left and see Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, a stuffed animal with a cute red ribbon around his neck. He always sits on that book, centered in the window of my parent’s cabin. Another Rudolph rests on a shoebox to the side of the window. My mom likes Rudolphs.

We write so many articles about how to feed our children nutritious food. How will we coax our children to eat their veggies? How will we prevent Flaming Hot Cheetos from becoming a breakfast staple?

No one seems to write articles about convincing parents to eat fruits and veggies, though. I watch in disbelief as my mom and dad pour chocolate soy milk on their chocolate cheerios.  My mom wanders around the house carrying chocolate chip cookies to nibble as she goes. Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds is about as healthy as it gets in my folk’s house.

I throw rotting veggies from the bottom fridge drawer under bushes in the backyard’s overgrown garden.  I resist efforts to feed me chocolate muffins. I try to duck endless low-cost, high-fat American restaurant meals.

But in the end, a parent’s gotta do what a parent’s gotta do, I guess.

Watching the world cup

soccer ball

The granddaughter is glued to the world cup. I glance over now and then, stopping to focus at times. My mom and dad talk to each other across the cabin, oblivious. Mom is watching now, because the game happens to be there. If the game were a cooking show, she would be watching that. She wanders away.

Argentina hasn’t scored in 292 minutes the announcer says. Soccer has not become an American pastime and we looked pretty sad as we played in this World Cup. Back and forth and back and forth the U.S. players ran, mostly on the wrong side of the field.

We are going to get better. My bilingual students love this sport. When I go to games after school, I watch the passion, the skill, the persistence. It won’t happen this year or next, but we are going to win the World Cup within the next couple of decades. The face of America is changing and our World Cup prospects will change too.

Readers, how do you feel about the World Cup? If that journal topic does not appeal, you might write about why you like your favorite sport.

Painting the porch?

I’m still in Mineral and my dad is about to paint the porch. It’s supposed to get up to 90 today. Dad was born in 1926. The guy had a pacemaker put in not that long ago. He’s also blind. This is the damndest plan.

But I am clueless how to derail the train. When dad makes up his mind, he’s a genuine force of nature. I guess I’ll just get the long sleeves off him and hope for the best.

I fed apples to two deer and three fawns this morning. They come right up to the house.  The lake reflects the trees with only a slight breeze ruffling the west shore into tiny waves, tiny flashes of light.

I can’t draw slips out of my jar, now thousands of miles away, so I guess I’ll just journal. Readers, have you had a parent who was an unstoppable force with a short fuse? Have you had to try to figure out what to do with porch plans?

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